kunimeh | overflow/inbox

Whoa, hey - !

[Kunimi's face goes hot and he tugs at his shirt, trying fruitlessly to yank it out of Oikawa's grasp. This is so far beyond any reaction he could've imagined, and he no longer understands where any of the rage is even coming from - if he knows it was consensual, why does Oikawa keep saying "hurt you" like that? Like he got beaten up, not screwed roughly enough to leave some marks?

He gestures in the direction of their teammates' voices with a beseeching look on his face - can Oikawa at least keep his voice down? He doesn't need them all marching in to see the evidence that'll prove all their whispers right.]

If you really need to know, I can show you. Just - keep it down?

[ Honestly? Oikawa doesn't know why he's reacting this way, either. There's a feeling inside him that goes beyond simple concern for a teammate and friend, something he isn't used to feeling, and it's all he can do to keep his grip on reality as panic floods his veins.

Why wasn't he there? He should've been protecting him. After all that shit with Tobio, Oikawa promised himself he'd never let another bully destroy Kunimi the way that brat had. It's been a gift to watch Kunimi blossom over the past few months, to see that he's so much more than some pawn to be used by a pompous jerk - and now, now that everything is going so well, Oikawa let Kunimi out of his sight for a few hours and-!!

He swallows, forcing himself to breathe, as he hears the shock in Kunimi's voice. He nods without speaking, grasp loosening on the fabric of Kunimi's shirt but not quite letting go just yet. It's almost as though they're suddenly adrift in the ocean, and if Oikawa lets go he'll lose Kunimi forever. ]

[Oh. Oikawa's really not okay right now.

Kunimi tries to tell his stomach not to fill with butterflies, his chest not to seize with pitiful hope, but he can't. Seeing Oikawa like this has triggered the tiny, tiny sliver of his heart that insists on believing things can work out, it's totally possible that Oikawa might one day look past all his admirers and fans and precious near-lifelong best friend and see Kunimi not as a kid, a kouhai, a teammate, but a potential partner he wants to claim as his own.

Shut up, he tells that part of him. Shut up shut up shut up. Something else must be bothering him. This is just how it's coming out. It's nothing to do with me.]

... Oikawa-senpai? [He rests a hand tentatively on Oikawa's elbow.] Are you okay?

[ Oikawa knows he's teetering precariously close to an edge he cannot allow himself to fall over. The last time he had, he'd almost hit Kageyama; if Iwaizumi hadn't stopped him, he probably would've gotten kicked off the team. What consequences will there be this time, if he lets himself tip over that edge? If he gives in to this strange, frightened, overprotectiveness he's suddenly feeling?

He forces himself to take a breath. Then another. Then, finally, his smile returns, though Kunimi will likely be able to see right through just how fake it is. ]

Of course I am, Kunimi-chan!

[ He even manages a little laugh, light and tinkling like bells. His hands fall away from the other's shirt and he rubs at the back of his head, suddenly looking embarrassed of himself. ]

Sorry about that - I don't know what came over me. I just get so worried about my precious kouhais! But I guess you're growing up, too, aren't you? I should probably give you more credit.

[Well, at least he seems to have backed away from some kind of precipice. That's something. Kunimi had a feeling he wouldn't want to worry a kouhai and sure enough, turning the concern back on him has brought him back. For now.

He needs to keep an eye on this. Even if it does give him that giddy, nervous, idiotic what if feeling. Idolizing Oikawa as much as he adores him doesn't mean that Kunimi will ever deny the dark, erratic current that runs deep beneath his perfect smile.]

All good. Not like you can help it when I was, like, 12? When we met? [The idea of Oikawa still seeing him as that gawky little nerd actually makes Kunimi die inside, but now is not the time to think about that! He returns Oikawa's smile with a crooked grin.] And I'm glad you still wanna look out for me. It's - nice.

[ This is right. This is good. Oikawa feels more like the person he needs to be already, mature and responsible, a shining light that can lead his team to victory. The darkness lurking inside him can stay tucked away; there's no need for it right now.

Or ever. ]

Twelve?!

[ He blinks, then leans back, resting a few fingers against his chin as he thinks about it. ]

I can't believe it's been so long! You're practically all grown up now, Kunimi-chan!

[ He levels the other boy with a bright look, but that darkness is still hiding in his eyes, is still evident in the way they flicker down to where that bruise is hiding beneath Kunimi's collar.

Kuroo, huh? ]

I'll always look out for you, silly. That's what a good senpai does!

[These shared, secret moments, just the two of them hidden away from the rest of the team and speaking with an intimacy that would startle even their closest friends, always bring the truth right to the tip of Kunimi's tongue and make it almost impossible to bite back.

I'll always look out for you, Oikawa says, and Kunimi's mind screams I love you, I love you, oh my god I love you so much, please see it written all over my face, bleeding from every pore, please hear it echoing all around me, I can't even imagine loving anyone else, I love you I love you I love you

But then, thankfully, that's what a good senpai does puts him right back in his place. There's always some remark like that. It's hard, but Kunimi can't honestly say it hurts. If Oikawa ever leaves one of those doors open, that'll be the day Kunimi ruins everything.]

You should probably get back to the rest of the team before they think something's wrong, Oikawa-senpai. [Almost as if Oikawa's gaze irritated it, Kunimi rests a hand lightly on his wounded shoulder.] I'm, uh, gonna get cleaned up over here... I won't be long.

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